Dearest Brothers and sisters,
Among the other characteristics of the God kind of love that we have discussed, we must also balance this subject with the fact that love is not always permissive.
Brethren, you’ll find that our heavenly Father loves us enough to correct us. He’ll correct you before you go too deep into sin and it destroys you. If you were heading to Nakuru and you’re on Mombasa road heading south, it’s better to be corrected and to make a U-turn back to the right way before you go too far towards Mombasa.
Heb.12:6-8 For whom the LORD loves He chastens, And scourges every son whom He receives.” 7 If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? 8 But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. NKJV
There is a tough side to love. There’s also a time when we have to confront people. There’s a time when we tell someone in love: “I don’t appreciate the way you’re treating me and I’m not going to put up with it.” There’s a time to tell another: “No I’m not going to do this for you because I’m just enabling you to keep your problem.” I think that’s so important to realize that sometimes the best thing you can say to somebody is: “No, I won’t do that for you, because that’s your responsibility and you need to take the responsibility to do right.” The apostle Paul was in such situations severally where he had to make correction.
For example in his letter to the Corinthians:
2 Cor. 7:8-10 Amplified Bible: “For even though I did grieve you with my letter, I do not regret [it now], though I did regret it; for I see that that letter did pain you, though only for a little while; 9 Yet I am glad now, not because you were pained, but because you were pained into repentance [and so turned back to God]; for you felt a grief such as God meant you to feel, so that in nothing you might suffer loss through us or harm for what we did. 10 For godly grief and the pain God is permitted to direct, produce a repentance that leads and contributes to salvation and deliverance from evil, and it never brings regret; but worldly grief (the hopeless sorrow that is characteristic of the pagan world) is deadly [breeding and ending in death].”
Of course you always have to be led by the Spirit in these things; sometimes you can put up with things, but when it comes to abuse, or somebody hurting themselves by you continuing to let them do certain things, then for their sake, that’s when you need to put your foot down and say: “No more!” God is love and yes love is not permissive of evil.